We've been waiting for travel for one month. Yesterday marked exactly one month ago that we learned of our brown eyed baby in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Looking back it went quite quickly. Some days are harder than others.
Last night Zach and I got to go shopping as Santa Claus. It is our first Christmas where we went together to get the kids their stuff. It was a lot of fun. I think all the kids will be happy with their loot. I was getting a little crazy, Zach had to remind me that Tariku was not actually with us yet and, as much as I imagined him tearing through the wrapping to open up his new winter coat, he was not going to be doing it. He would still be in a blazing hot climate with very little knowledge of us.
Last night was also the first night Zach and I got to talk in length about our fears, hopes, etc. Usually there's a child and/or family member around and we don't feel like we can be as open as we might be otherwise. It was good to get my hubby to talk about his expectations. I think we are both very realistic in what we are expecting and I myself am preparing for the worst (constant tantrums, neverending grief, etc) and hoping for the best. The hardest part thus far is trying to tell Trysten every time he talks about Tariku that it will still be some time before we can bring him home.
By far the most difficult thing for Zach and I to wrap our heads around is our life. We've suffered loss, sure. But the loss of a family, culture, home; these are things we know nothing about nor can we pretend that we could possibly understand what that must feel like. Zach is afraid he will come back from Ethiopia and feel the slightest bit worthless with this life in the land of the privaleged. I am trying to see the positive in that we can be the propellants who make our family and friends aware of the plight happening to our brothers and sisters in Africa and around the world. We will see how even more passionate we can become about this subject after we have "been in the trenches" (or at least as much as you can for a week, in a nice guest house) with our family in Ethiopia.
For now, we can wait. I am guessing the very earliest they will be calling us about travel will be this time in January to tell us of a Feb travel. The good part about the wait is it is giving us time to really learn about the conditions of the peoples of Ethiopia. The HIV pandemic in Africa and the monstrosity in Darfur. There is no shortage of places in the world in desperate need of prayer and I've learned the more I learn the more I want to learn and the more I NEED to help. I would encourage one and all to do the same! The worst part about the wait is that my child is half a world away and my cheeks are in desperate need of kisses from three children.